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36 Movie Reviews

I ran out of characters for review! had tosqaushit

I've actually written a review to you before, but under a different alias...oooow, cool alias...I was Tweek before -> but that wasn't memorible enough so i changed it to something more red and skully.
I'd like to ask why you always refer to yourself as "we" i mean, what? are you some kind of basted!?... I mean crazy person? or do you actually have a team..
By the way i think you did all the voices for snake really well, except the simple text one, that is annoying.
hahah crotchless panties
The credits part was the best, you should have just subbmitted a long credits thingo.
In terms of improvments which i can recomend - which will probably be ignored but i like to put down anyway, in the faint hope that they'll have the slightest influence on later work - I don't think you should have made the faces of the people shake quite so much as it was rather annoying. Also, if your going to make something like this, with very few pictures (which is fine mind you) then you could at least spend more than 5 minutes drawing the faces. It would have been ok if you made them look ridiculous by drawing them shit, but it just looked like some 12 year old had tried to draw them.
In a couple of your replies and notices about flashes thingys you mentioned you make these while your drunk/stonned and i would just like to congratulate you on this achievement. Frankly I don't know how the shit you did that. If i tried to construct anything - least of all a flash work - while i was stonned i would probably end up being distracted by the letter "R" and then thinking i should eat some more before the flying pussies come...I'm sure you know where i'm going with this. Anyway well done on that.
I haven't written a review for a while and am pissed off the find that Newgrounds have changed the format the reveiw page, its now too small and considerablely more shit, consequentally i'm typing this is microsoft word. I thought you should know that because i know your a caring person...somehow.
An overal score of 6 might seem a bit shit considering how much i enjoy your work over all, but a line must be drawed somewhere! Cause i didn't like this as much as other stuff you've done. Persons will vote 5 and review 10 for people such as LegendaryFrog (just an example) just because they see his name on it, rather than for the actual skill which has gone into his animation.
Also you'd have to understand that if i were to give it a 10, espesially because its been made to make you laugh, i would have to have had laugh my ass off, literally, and some flash has done that to me, i've sat there and laughed for 5 minutes and watched it over and over again, when you can do that to me, i'll give it 10.
Another suggestion: I like the way your voice sounds speeded up, it's funny, it reminds me of a gay chipmonk, which we don't have in Australia...we have possums - do you have them in EuroEnglishlnd? - i think you should try slowing down your voice as well, cause that would be heaps funny and then you would (as you said to me last time i wrote something to you,) sound like Barry White, who, most irronically, is a black man, While having a name like white...
By now your probably wondering why i'm still writing, and that my friend is because it's all about quality, not quantity. Which is irrelevent considering what i'm about to say.
Also people will be impressed when they inevitably go to my profile and veiw my reviews.
Well i don't really have anything more to say about your flash, but if you type in "fuck a duck" or anything that rhymes with those syllables sympletext, you'l find it's quite funny, so give that a shot.
I’l give you the statistics of this review:
·Spelling and grammatical errors: 56
·Words: 746
·Characters (no spaces): 3,346
·Characters (spaces): 4,122
·Time to write: about 15 minutes
·Music listened to while writing: The Crystal Method
·Paragraphs: 25
·Lines: 77
·Word processor used: Microsoft Word
Hope you enjoyed, I know I did! And I hope to see more stuff from you!

cockjockey responds:

Unfortunately, Solid Snake probably won't be making another appearance for a while, as I am now blind from looking at the monitor for enough time to read your sequel to War and Peace/The Bible/Elton Johns list of people he's bummed. Just kidding, it's actually quite nice to read a review every once in a while that doesn't just say "Dat woz gud mak more" or "you're shit diediedie" or one of those idiots that insults you with every key except the ones with letters on them. I'm so impressed I'm actually going to acknowledge every last point you made.
1. "We" refers to myself and the othere guy who did most of the actual work. We're not really in touch anymore coz I was a bit of a twat and lost his PC and... long story. I'm working on getting it back tho, maybe one day. Mind you he does have a mohawk now so I'm not so sure I'd like to be seen in public with him anymore. If you're reading Paul, just kidding :)
2. We got stoned for the PS3 thing, but were mainly just drunk for this one on Fosters by a weird coincidence ("Fosters - Australian for piss").
3. A 12 year old?!?!? Cheeky sod, I'll have you know that kid was nine, and it was a damn good achievement. Plus he had no arms and he was epileptic. He'd go on photoshop for five minutes, have a fit, then we'd snap the fucker out of it and make him sit there til it was done.
4. I'd have given it four quite frankly just on the basis that the intro is TOO FUCKING LONG. The reason for that is I love the bit of music that went with it (Plunkett and Maclane Soundtrack by Craig Armstrong, Hanging Scene, for those of you with the interweb and a downloady thingy), so nurr.
5. I don't think we have possums or chipmunks over here, the wildlife is so boring that a paint drying observation tournament in Belgium would be preferable. If we did have them though, they'd probably be gay.
6. I was going to say something about my friend Steve Native American who isn't really a Native American at all or Steve Italian, or Steve Eskimo, but theres a spliff being made right next to me and its nearly done so I really can't be arsed anymore. Pete (the roller) says hi, incidentally.
Again, thanks for the epic review and don't you dare fucking ever write another one because I can't be doing with getting RSI from a reply again.
Stay frosty

Give a one-line summary of your review...how?

I just finished watching all your stuff, and, to tell the truth, it's not that bad. I used to think i hate all locks/clocks animations no matter what, but now i justs hates the lockses. THE LOCKSES! WE HATES THEM....

By the way, i like to write unnessisariliy long and meaningful/less reviews.

I really like that tank. Did you draw it? cause you seem to have it somewhere at least once in each of your animations. It's the metal slug tank right? Oh how i love that game...

I know you know i know you know that i know but i think you should make at lesat some of your stuff longer..cause its funny, but it all seems to continue on from the previous thing so you might as well make it just the one submission so people (like me) can look at it in one session rather than three.

Your good at shadowing which is good. Submissions what lack shadowing just don't have that nice touch about them..so, keep ..erm, doing good stuff!

I'm just saying this cause for the last person i reviewed i expressed my discontent towards his use of swords which were too short for the characters. Anyway he wrote back and paid me out for writing such a long review and not having submitted anything yet well, i'm WORKING ON IT! i just don't wanna send in shit to "test it"...Anyway, so, i thought you should know that too.

Now for more about YOUR movies!

I really like that sound when grim clock or whatever that thing is hits people with its little spiked bat, Thwak! Where'd you get that sound? where do you get sound like that? and while we're on sounds, how do you make the lock's voices? I know of a similar feature in SimpleText but it can only do like one voice like that you seem to have heaps.
Also you have a "fully awsome sick arsonal" of good music. You've got your korn, you've got your System of a Down, and you've got your Rammstein. all good!

GLARG!

Although you clearly like Locks, for some reason or another, i think it would be good if you made, at lesat some stuff that didn't have them. I'm not saying stop with the locks, cause you wont', but there is more to the world and lollie pops and bubblegum i'm afraid!

What's OCP? and what are those things that come out of him? And most importantly why is that man with bleed (yes bleed) coming out of his eye...

Your cool things section are really cool, most people who make stuff like that do it really badly, and arn't creative at all. i like the effect you use where they sort of stretch in a direction, then back again, really quickly, how do?
It's also very kind of you to put seizur warnings...But people will think your strange...

You know, apparently Glarg is a real word? but only when you spell it GLARG, i checked with word.

Character count: 2664, jeez, i still have another 1432 words characters left...oh well, this will have to do. I would write more but yesterday i was exerciseing my middle finger with a bulldog clip and now my whole arm hurts...

Your truely, Tha Red Skull

AubergineLock responds:

ho

ly

shit. You love to type don't you? Heh, now to answer your questions. Yes, i drew that tank, the design is taken from metal slug though. And when Gothlock hits people and the sound makes the wacking sound, i got that from flashkit.com, an excellent resource for sound effects.

I think i'll skip some of the other stuff, your reviews bigger than the xbox...

Glarg is a word gothlock made up, i know him in real life, he shouted it when anopther friend threw a box at his head.

Oh, i just noticed you reviewed all my other movies all in one! Well, i read your whole review and i found it very constructive,, and one of the best i have recived. I thankyou for your time.

This is the only thing i've ever given 10.

But really, it deserves it. This is my new favourite submission, and, after watching your other stuff, you’re my favourite author.

When he made his wish for a giant penis my friend and I laughed so hard we were crying, for about 5 minutes. That is the funniest thing I’ve seen on NewGrounds.

I love your style and artwork. In all your animations the way the people don't look quite normal, just a line to for their faces, it's cool.

You always have the best and most creative soundtracks; I don’t know where you find some of the music, but its truly gold. It always seems to fit in with what's happening.

Do you draw everything frame by frame? Cause it looks that way. Everything is so perfectly smooth and cool. Please tell me if you do. If so, that's fucking awesome, I know how long it can take to do that, but it's worth it, the results are stunning.

I'd just like to give you credit also (it's something small but makes a huge difference) for the brilliant shadowing and backgrounds. Probably most people don't notice, but you've drawn the backgrounds with explicit detail, flawless in my opinion.

Your imagination must be really (and this isn't necessarily a bad thing) twisted. I don’t know how you come up with this stuff, its not imaginative, and original. Truly unique, nothing like it anywhere on NewGrounds, or anywhere else for that matter.

Recent Game Reviews

5 Game Reviews

sadly, we're not in pre-school anymore.

good graphics. that little thing that talked's voice was too quite..and squeaky. i was hoping there would be somekind of humor in it, but apparentally not. it genuanly is desinged to help those less fortunate of us to distinguse between a tree and a smiling blue mouse. boring waste of my time. i dont know why its this popular.

too repeditive..

suggestions for improvment: make more weapons, make it so some of em move in different ways, make it so you can shoot em in different parts of their body, something cool should happen when you kill em all, draw less stick guys but animate them better, add some kind of hardcore or and i do mean or, elivator type music. if you do all thatr, i rekon it would be bareble.

you only got 3 because i like porn...

there should have been like levels and stuff, and the questions should have been like relevent. and the girl shoulden't have looked like she was scared and about to be raped. and there should have been more sex. and the girl should have been hotter. and more real. like. real. and the only reaon it has been popular is becuase ppl (like me) thought they would be getting a bit of free porn. and were probably disapointed but didnt say so. that is all

Do not speak of that which you do not know. Rumpelstiltskin!

Age 36, Male

Brain Surgeon

St Christ

SA, Australia

Joined on 12/19/03

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